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I just read up on Saint Valentine on the web, and there is nothing to suggest that this martyr of the Catholic church has anything to do with the traditions of modern Valentine’s Day. The feast of St. Valentine first occurred in the year, 496 and it was established by Pope Gelasius I. In fact no one really is sure who Saint Valentine was as he appeared in various martyologies. Throughout history he has been described as a priest in Rome, a bishop or priest in Interamna or a Martyr in the Roman province of Africa. Knowing that what I am about to say isn’t sacrilegious makes me feel more comfortable knowing that God will not strike me down for this view, but I will probably further secure my seat in hell.  For me, I picture hell as being a room full of excellent cigars but not having anything to light them with.

Valentine’s Day as celebrated today is an evil holiday. It is a holiday where people are forced to bestow gifts on their loved ones because of a man made tradition. I am sure many relationships, including marriage have had to deal with a speed bump because of a forgotten gift or one that did not reach expectations. In fact you should not need a holiday to make that special someone feel special. If you are truly in love, everyday is special day filled with the nuances that make the relationship special. You should not need an excuse to bring home flowers, candy or jewelry to name a few. These gifts should be given throughout the year. Do I sound bitter? Well, I am. You see as a single person I am reminded how lonely it feels on this man made holiday. Hell, I even miss out on another man made holiday, Steak and Blow Job Day on March 14th.

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  • Israel

    Awesome!

  • http://www.straightupcigars.com Straight Up Cigars

    Well Said Barry. I am really looking forward to March 14th!

    Hearts and roses and kisses galore,
    What the hell is all of that shit for?
    People get mushy and start acting queer,
    It is definitely the most annoying day of the year.
    This day needs to get the hell over with and pass,
    Before I shove a dozen roses up Cupid’s ass!
    I’ll spend the day so drunk that I just can’t speak,
    And wear only black for the rest of the week.
    Guys act all sweet but it soon will fase,
    For all they are doing is trying to get laid.
    The arrow Cupid shot at me must not have hit,
    Because I think love is a big cock of shit!
    So here is my story, what else can I say?
    Love bites my ass…Fuck Valentine’s Day

    Thanks for the link and keep up the good work!

  • ChristianCRA

    Love the story. And if everyday SHOULD be Valentines day than so should March 14th. For health reasons I eat less steak but I try to stock up on the other cause if I am going do die of something I’m going out hard! As for the blazing heat of hell to paraphrase Bart Simpson; “Wouldn’t you eventually get used to it like bathwater?”

  • Wham I Am The Man

    my oldest son was born on st. valentine’s day (he’ll be 7 tomorrow)… so for the rest of his life… his wife and/or girlfriends will give him a combo gift……one gift for his birthday AND for st. valentine’s day… life ain’t fair….

  • http://www.tomscigars.com Tom

    This brings another popular holiday to mind, you know, the big one in December. Luckily for all of us, there is no one in the sky that can damn you to hell. Rest easy, it’s all fake!

    Good rant either way.

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